Joshua, my man and I are planning a wedding!! I have been so absent from writing because He has been writing for me, in my every day, a beautiful story of writing specifically to me. All the letters, prayers and tears I have poured out waiting for Josh, the Lord has spoken to me so many times…”I have heard every prayer”. It truly is an incredible love story. One that only the author of marriage and relationships could write. Josh and I have quickly seen how He has brought us together to fulfill one of His main reasons for marriage, it is to display the Glory of God. What a crazy ride it has been thus far….
Let me start from the beginning. I was actually going through my photos on my iphone and amazed at how the new ios7 categorizes your pictures so well. My last few months of my life are told in this camera roll and it’s dates.
So I will recap the last year in pictures. To sit here and go back, to go back to my chaos and pain, my mountain tops, my magical moments, the first kiss, the first cry, the first time I held her and saw her smile, the first time we prayed over here, him down on one knee, celebrations, and the continued orange road….
February 2013– I traveled back to Uganda for my second year. I came with my church from home, Austin Christian Fellowship, who I began this journey with five years ago! Before they left to return back to the States, they circled around me and had one of the most incredible prayer times I can remember. This girl, Emily, her prayer rocked my world as she began praying over a very specific fear and area of my life that I had a lot of unbelief in. I hadn’t talked in-depth with Emily about this but she prayed as if she and I had hours and hours of conversation discussing the state of my heart. She prayed that God would bring my husband, one that would love ministry and this country as much as I did. One that would join me in the field. She prayed for my patience and a heart that would continue to wait on Him in a place where it seemed impossible. I remember the Lord stirring in my heart during that time of sweet prayer and lots of snot 🙂
I also must remember the miracles. Agnes, who had suffered from many seizures had one of her worst at the beginning of March. She was unconscious for several hours and her little body was too weak. After many prayers lifted up around the world and around her bedside, the little sweetness came to life and since then…NO SEIZURES!! We have seen great improvement in her life from the physical to the emotional.
Then there was this guy…a friend that I had been hanging out with a little bit. The night before Easter I was preparing and matching flowers, headbands and dresses. This guy came an helped me and even modeled some for me. If he had the patience to sit through that junk, I knew he was going to handle girls well. I might have formed a little crush that night as he helped me make the perfect dresses for my girls that night.
On a day that Joshua was extremely busy, he cleared his schedule to come to our home and capture the joy behind his camera. One of the many talents I would soon discover that he has. Jesus was so evident in this story in particular. Friends from home contacted me that their little girl instead of asking Santa Clause toys for her, she wanted Santa to bring 56 pairs of shoes so she could give them to our babies. How amazing is that? The love of Christ so pure and innocent in the lives of those we should look to more to as our examples. We had such a fun day telling the children that these dresses and shoes were package with love directly from Jesus.
The Lord was faithful in sweet friends that donated money for me to buy a car!! This car has been the biggest blessing in more ways than just getting me from Jinja to our babies home 45 minutes away-it also brought Josh and I together. When I first got the car we realized quickly that there were many problems that needed to be fixed. Yet again, Joshua stepped up to the plate and begin fixing my car 🙂 On our multiple trips to Kampala, the capital city, we had many conversations that showed our hearts were beginning to depend on each other for friendship. Jesus knew I needed a man who could fix things, living in this country where there is constant fixing to be had.
Amy came to our rescue. Amy and I still laugh about the way we were connected. It is again, one of God’s ways of showing us that He has the great big world in His massive hands and if he wants two people’s paths to cross, He can make it happen. Amy has adopted Favor, her little girl, from our home and does a beautiful job of always bringing her girls back to their original home. Amy came to help us as our nurse for our home and I honestly don’t know what I would have done without her during this time. The Lord used her to be a friend here to witness what Jesus was doing, help guide me and sit up late after my first date to hear all the details.
Amy and I were out at the home in April when I was told a father was there with his child. We do not just accept children into our home with no paper work and proper steps with the government. I was greeted by a gentle man and a very quiet woman with a very small bundle in her lap. You would have thought that it was a baby doll wrapped in a sheet it was so small.
Forever my heart is changed. This child has brought life. Life was brought to her through our faithful Daddy who allowed her to brought to our home to put meat on her bones and a smile on her face. My heart felt what I have heard so many of my “momma” friends say but I have never been able to relate. The times spent at 2am in the morning feeding a baby creates a bond that you didn’t know your heart could form. This sweet girl, who we call Leah, has taught me so much and I know He is going to continue to use her life to teach me more.
She has taught me submission. Submission to my Father and to my soon to be my husband. I have been independent for quite some time and this little one without knowing it took my heart to a place of submission even with Josh that was the first of many. It has been beautiful to watch what has happened after I have given all control over to the Lord.
Unfairness: I have always struggled with the question, “why me, God?” but in the sense of why was I born in the western world where we don’t have to worry about losing a child due to just a common sickness. Why did I get to be born in a place where malaria wasn’t rampant and babies didn’t suffer from the sin and curse of this fallen world like I see every day here? Never more have I fought God on His sovereignty as I did when I was holding this little one with a fever so high she was going unconscious and they couldn’t get a line her in her little tiny dehydrated veins. As I prayed that God would hold this one and hold me as I hate moments of anger, moments of desperation, and moments of fear. He held us both and once again, I see Him. See and hear him saying, Trust me. Even in death, trust me. Even in life, trust me. When something is so far beyond your control, it pushes me to His arms.
I have learned after being here for 2 years that there are many days when I would pick up the phone to talk to my parents, who I have always called when I needed wisdom, guidance and prayer, I would want to pour out my heart about my current world. But I couldn’t. It is hard for others to grasp it, hard to understand the multi-layers of everything here. I prayed and prayed that my parents could come together, to experience my life here with me, so when I needed to pick up the phone, they would understand more. It was a HUGE miracle to get the call that they were able to come because of our sweet family and friends that helped them to get here. To do ministry with my parents was incredible. I loved sharing with the two that have taught me what servanthood and ministry looks like and to see how it was their parenting that lead me here.
Can’t leave out my first boda accident. For those that don’t know, it is a very common form of transportation here, a motorbike that can carry one person or a whole house. As you can see I had a choice of either falling off and eating concrete or losing my entire skirt in town.
Hallie, my Rock Star of a friend came to find more fair trade for her amazing store #halliebrockwall! It is my dream one day to do the same with her because I love fashion, helping women realize their beauty, and to help organizations like Arise Africa all at the same time.
The time finally came where I was able to sit with the girls that have walked every season with me and we have had countless conversations about when we will meet the guy that we have all so patiently been waiting on. I will never forget this one. Lots of shrieking, crying, and laughing with the friends that I hope I walk with for many more years to come.
Ten years since I graduated High School with these lovelies. SO thankful for friendships that continue to last even after our adolescence.